Ask for her consent.
Consent is key for anything you do together, even if it’s over text. Ask her if she would be okay with having more intimate exchanges over text—specifically, sending photos. Make sure you know what she’s comfortable with and what pace she wants to set for the relationship; that way, you’ll know whether sending pics of herself is something she’s interested in doing in the first place. For an introductory pic, you could text, “How do you feel about sending selfies? I want to see your face, and I’m happy to send you pictures of me too.” When getting consent for more intimate pics, you could say, “Hey, I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately. Would you be comfortable with exchanging NSFW photos?” If you haven’t met or gotten to know one another well yet, asking for revealing photos (or nudes) sends the wrong signal to a girl. Instead, ask her if she’d be comfortable sending a cute selfie or a pic with her favorite outfit.
Get to know her.
A girl will probably wait to send pics until she’s comfortable with you. You can help her to feel comfortable around you by earnestly getting to know her. So, ask her questions about herself and listen when she talks to you. Be yourself, and be sure to share details about yourself when she asks; getting to know someone includes sharing as much information as you take in. Ask her a fun question, like “What’s your favorite way to treat yourself?” You can also make a note of her answer for the future. Ask her for a funny, less romantic pic. “What’s the most embarrassing photo on your camera roll?” Be ready to send her your embarrassing photo, too! Ask about the things that are important to her. “What is your biggest goal or aspiration in life?”
Give her lots of compliments.
Make her feel special and desired before asking for photos. Another great way to help her feel more comfortable with sending photos over text is to compliment her. Your girl is more likely to be in a mood to share pics of herself when she's feeling flattered and knows you're interested. Make sure your compliments are specific and sincere. Some examples of this could be: “Your eyes are so beautiful. Every time I look into them, it brightens my day! ????” “I love your determination and intelligence. You’re so good at everything you do!”
Look for hints that she’s interested.
A subtle approach to getting pics from a girl is best. If she’s the type of person who naturally enjoys flirting by sending photos, she’ll probably drop hints to clue you in. Look for texts where she says that she’s just bought some cute new clothes or that she’s trying to pick a dress to wear. Those might be hints that she’s feeling a little flirty—and she’s wondering if you are, too. If she’s trying on clothes, you could follow up with, “You have such great style! I’d love to see a pic of your new look ????”. Even if she mentions a pet doing something funny, that could be your transition into getting pics. Say something along the lines of “Wow, I’ve got to see a photo of that!”
Choose a good time to ask her for pics.
Ask your girl for pics when she’s probably alone and not busy. While you might not know everything going on in her life, you can generally use common sense here to figure out a good time. If she works during the day, then ask her for a photo at night, when you know she’s by herself and winding down for the night. She might mention in a text that she’s about to take a bath or get ready for bed, and these are ideal moments to ask for a picture. For example, later at night you could text her, “Hey there! Do you have time for a bedtime selfie? ????” To start off the exchange with a more intimate tone, you could say, “I’m about to get into bed, and I keep imagining that you’re here with me. Want to exchange photos?”
Stay classy when you ask.
Whether you want a simple selfie or something more revealing, be polite. Girls will respond positively to a request that is both sincere and respectful. A blunt “send nudes” text or a bunch of peach emojis won’t feel very respectful to her, especially if you don’t know each other well enough yet. Make it clear what you’re asking for, be courteous, and show her that you’re interested without being pushy. If this is your first time asking for pics, you could text her, “Getting to know you has been so great, but I’d love to put a face to this conversation! Would you mind sending a photo or two?” If you haven’t seen your girl in a while, you could write, “I miss seeing your beautiful face so much. Send me a selfie?” If you are trying to jumpstart a more steamy exchange (and you’ve made sure she’s into the idea), you could text, “I can’t stop thinking about you. ???? Want to trade sexy photos?”
Turn her on over text.
A girl is more likely to send pics when she’s in the right mood. If you’re looking for more intimate photos from your lady, then engage in some flirty banter first. You could start by telling her about a fond and steamy memory of her or a fantasy you have. Use nicknames like “gorgeous” or “cutie pie,” be playful, and tease her with suggestive comments to get her interested! Some flirty examples could be: “I had the hottest dream about you last night. Can I tell you about it?” “What’s your fantasy? Tell me all about it ????”
Delete the photos if she asks.
Exchanging pics can feel risky to a girl, especially revealing ones. She may be willing to send pics, but on the condition that you delete the photos once you’ve seen them, and you should always respect that request. You can also take the initiative and outright offer to delete them yourself to make her feel better. She’ll only send more photos in the future if she knows that she can trust you. She might be more comfortable using an app like Snapchat, where the picture disappears a few seconds after being sent. Reassure her that she can leave her face out of steamy photos to put her mind at ease. Some people who send revealing pics keep their faces hidden to protect themselves.
Let her know that you enjoy the pics.
A girl will only send more photos once she knows you like them. Express in words, GIFs, and emojis how much you appreciate it when you get photos from your girl over text. Single out something you especially love about the photo to mention or express enthusiasm with your favorite lovestruck GIF. For example: “Wow, your smile in this photo blows me away! You’re beautiful.” “You’re so gorgeous! ???? Thanks for sending this pic.”
Send her a pic first.
Ease her into the exchange by taking the first step. She may be more comfortable putting herself out there and sending photos if she sees that you’re willing to do it too. Send the first photo and let her respond to it—but because this is the first exchange, start with a selfie (or just a revealing, but not fully nude pic) to get things going. Before you send a pic of yourself, make sure that she’s okay with receiving it. If she says “no,” don’t send one! You could text her, “Hey! I’d love to exchange photos. Can I send you one of myself to start?”
Be understanding if she says no.
Not everybody feels comfortable with sending photos of themselves. She might decide later that she is comfortable with sending you pics, but getting pushy or angry at her in the meantime will only drive her away. Respect her boundaries, and let her know that while you would love to see more of her, you completely understand why she doesn’t want to send photos right now. If she says no, you could respond with, “Hey, that’s okay! There’s no pressure at all to send a pic. And if you ever do feel like it, I’ll take any chance to see your beautiful face! ????”
Be patient.
Every relationship moves at its own pace. The girl you’re texting may ask you to wait a little while before she sends pics, or have a firm policy on only exchanging photos after the first date. Communicate with her so that you know what she likes and dislikes. Take your time with getting to know her and pace yourself when it comes to asking for photos. To pace yourself, start simple with cute selfies and everyday pics that she’ll be comfortable sharing before you graduate to asking for naughty photos. Make it clear to her that you’re willing to be patient. “I definitely want to see more pics of you, but only as much as you’re comfortable with. Would you be up for sending me a selfie sometime? ????”
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