- Get creative. Send your crush a funny meme, ask their opinion on the latest episode of your favorite show, or ask them a shoot them a compliment.
- Start a debate by asking them an interesting open-ended question or ask them to help you with something (like your homework).
- Be yourself! Sharing your hobbies, interests, and sense of humor can be a great way for them to get to know the true you.
Comment on their Story.
Commenting on their Story shows that you’re interested in their life. Using Snapchat’s Stories is a great way for people to show their friends what they’re up to – and a great way for you to get a conversation going! Pay attention to what they say so you can ask for updates along the way. For example, if they say they’re going to a movie with a friend or to dinner with their family, this gives you the opportunity to show that you care about them and ask how it all went afterward. “Where are you vacationing? That view is incredible ????” “I love that band too! What’s your fav song?” “That’s my favorite restaurant! Have you tried their (insert food item)?”
Send a pic and ask them their opinion.
Share a fun picture of whatever you’re doing and see what they say. Snap a picture of your outfit, your meal, the movie you’re watching… the possibilities are endless! Be spontaneous and have fun. “I’m watching the new Tween Bay movie, have you seen it yet?” “Just baked a cake for the first time! How should I decorate it?” “Listening to this new song I found… Have you heard it before?”
Share a funny meme or video.
Send them a video or joke you find hilarious to start a convo. Messaging your crush with something lighthearted is a great way to show your personality and break the ice. Send a TikTok, a picture, or a short clip of whatever makes you laugh! As you two talk more and more, then you can slowly build up to more personal and emotional conversations. You can also relate the video to real life to add a personal touch: “This made me think of you” “This reminds me of that time in math class lol” “This is definitely you”
Send a playful selfie.
Selfies are a great way to get a conversation started. Selfies can be a great way to share your life and show that you’re comfortable with who you are. They can also be a great opportunity to let your creativity soar. Use Snapchat filters, stickers, voice changers, and your imagination to create a unique and interesting selfie. Be your authentic self. Admitting in your captions that you took the selfie because “The lighting was so good in this room” or because you “Just felt pretty” can add humor and show you’re feeling confident in yourself. If you’re feeling nervous about sending a snap of your face, try sending a picture of you at an event, with a group of friends, or snuggled up to a furry friend.
Ask about their interests and hobbies.
Asking open-ended questions helps you get to know them better. Ask them if they saw the newest episode of your favorite show, if they watched the latest football game, or if they’re excited about the big blockbuster coming out this summer. A great first message focuses on them and who they are as a person, and your relationship will feel easier and invite more intimacy down the road if your crush feels like the two of you share a common interest. “Did you watch the Knights game last night?” “Have you ever seen The Cable? I think you’d like it!” “Are you going to see the new Z-Women movie? The trailer looks amazing”
Get a debate going.
Ask their opinion on a not-so-controversial topic. Cats or dogs? Red Sox or the Yankees? Is a hot dog a sandwich? Do aliens exist? Ask them funny and interesting debate topics for a great way to break the ice and start a back-and-forth conversation that could last for days. If you’re nervous, you can also frame this as a debate you’re having with your friend and ask them to break the tie. “Is cheesecake considered a pie?” “Unfrosted PopTarts are the superior PopTarts.” “Is ice a rock?”
Ask for their help.
This can be a great low-key way to start a conversation. Having trouble with a homework problem? Don’t know what the teacher was talking about in class yesterday? Need help solving an especially difficult crossword clue? Asking your crush for their help can give them a “helper’s high,” which can lower their stress and increase their happiness. When they help you out, they just might start associating those positive feelings with talking to you. “Hey, did you understand the homework for Mrs. Panini’s class?” “Have you tried the Wordle today? I’m stuck!” “What did you get for number four on the math homework? How did you get that answer?”
Include them in a group snap.
Snap a pic of your adventures and send it to them and your friends. This is a great way to test the waters and see if your crush is interested in snapping you back – if they do, then you can go from there. You could also add them to a group with a few of your friends. That way, your crush might feel less intimidated about snapping you back. You can also include your crush in your daily Snapstreaks. Streaks (the little fire emoji????) mean that you and a friend have Snapped each other within 24 hours for more than 3 days straight. Send a pic captioned “streaks” to your crush to try and start a streak with them!
Share an interesting article.
Send them a link to a piece of news you know they'd find interesting. Whether it’s a story about a well-known celeb, an announcement for the newest iPhone, or a site about horoscopes, sharing an article about something you like can be a great way to start the conversation. Plus, sharing common passions and viewpoints can build up familiarity and create a sense of safety in your relationship. Try not to send them a bunch of random links. Keep it simple, and add your own thoughts in a separate message to start or continue the conversation.
Compliment them.
Don’t underestimate the power of flattery as a convo starter. A kind or flirty compliment can be a good way to start a conversation off on a positive note. To start, avoid complimenting them on their body or how they looked that day, and try focusing on parts of their personality you admire. “I love your taste in music. I feel like our playlists are exactly the same!” “You have the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen.” “Great job at your soccer game, you crushed it!”
Update your Story.
Post a cute pic to your story to get your crush’s attention. You can post something you know your crush likes, or show off your hobbies and interests. For example, if you know your crush loves concerts, posting a picture of you at a concert might catch their eye and they may even swipe up and start the conversation first. You can even ask your followers what they think about your picture in the captions to prompt your crush to message you first! Post a video of you playing guitar, dancing, or hanging out with friends to show your crush what you do in your spare time. Have an embarrassing picture of you at your cousin’s birthday party? Posting an old pic from your camera roll can be a great way to laugh at old memories and might catch your crush’s attention.
Keep the convo going.
Build on what you've already talked about to keep chatting. Switch topics when natural, text them about school or homework, ask them about their family, and slowly get more personal as time goes along. Texting long-term early on in the courting stage can mean you miss out on your crush’s tonality and body language. When your conversations get more romantic, don’t be afraid to make a move and take your relationship to the real world! When you’re feeling confident and ready, suggest having coffee, studying together, or going to a movie.
Take it slow to avoid spamming them.
Make sure you’re giving your crush plenty of space. If they leave you on read, don’t panic. You never know what might be going on behind the scenes. If you keep snapping them without getting a response, they might feel intimidated and avoid responding back altogether. Try to keep your responses casual and step back a little if they seem unresponsive. If you’re not sure how to respond to something your crush sends, take your time! You don’t have to respond instantly, and it can even be better to take it slow and carefully craft a better response.
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