How to Act Smart

Mastering Conversation Skills

Listen more and speak less. As the saying goes, "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt." If you want to viewed as reasonably smart, keep your mouth shut. Talk less and when you do talk, what you say will be valued that much more. It helps that "smart" people are generally viewed as more introverted, as inaccurate as that is. Not only will you have the benefit of the doubt, but you'll have the stereotype on your side, too.

Use proper grammar. "Mama said I dun need none no book learnin'. Now gid off th' property!" If you got that, you're probably picturing someone in overalls with a strand of wheat hanging from their upper lip, rifle in hand. Not exactly smart looking, huh? How about, "Mother said I didn't need any book learning. Now get off the property." A little strange (why was mother so against formal education, anyway?), but definitely smarter. "Proper" here meaning by the standards of conventional American or British English (or whatever umbrella your dialect falls under). While saying "y'all" is totally acceptable and not technically incorrect in certain dialects, it's not okay in others. In order to be truly proper, speak the kind of English they teach you in school.

Pronounce your words fully. It's totally natural to drop the "g" from -ing words and to say things like "coulda" or "kinda," but if you're really looking to sound smart, those habits will have to be dropped. Slow your speech a bit, say the full words, and speak a bit more formally. People may wonder why you talk like that and the answer? Intelligence. "I dunno. I think I'm gonna go with 'em to the show fer 'bout an hour," is more intelligently said as "I don't know. I think I'm going to go with them to the show for about an hour." And that doesn't take any mental work -- just talking.

Avoid textspeak and mallspeak. OMG, like, really?! LOL. No. Just no. In your new smart-sounding communication, there is no IDK-ing, no inserting "like," "you know," or "umm" every third word. Don't do it. If you think you don't do it, spend an hour actually listening to yourself. Seriously. Avoid the abbreviations and the acronyms (like "totes" or "BRB"). That's text speak and shouldn't even really be used on your phone (especially if you want to keep up the façade). Mallspeak is where, you, like, talk like this, and, umm, like, you fill the empty spaces, with, like, and, umm, rising intonation and it, like, always sounds like you're asking questions when you're, like, really not. Basically don't talk like you're in Clueless. The "valley girl" dialect isn't viewed as particularly intelligent, to say the least.

Stick to what you know. Even Alex Trebek would sound like an idiot if he had to expound on the five ages of the universe. It doesn't matter how smart you are -- if you don't know anything about the topic matter, you won't sound intelligent. So stick to what you know! Don't put pressure on yourself to join in on a conversation about the Glass-Steagall Act if it's not your cup of tea. No one can add valuable input to every conversation. Try to steer the conversation at hand if you're really aching to show your stuff. Maybe you don't know anything about the Glass-Steagall Act, but you know a tidbit or two about Roosevelt. Get the conversation about him and jump on it! Find your opening (six degrees of Kevin Bacon style) and grab the wheel. That's how conversations progress, after all!

Quote something. There's an episode of Friends where Monica and Chandler run into Monica's ex-boyfriend, Richard. While Chandler is busting out poop jokes, Richard recites, "In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed." Who's the smarter one in this scenario? Quoting that doesn't mean Richard is smart, but it sure makes him look like it! In case you were curious, that's a Khalil Gibran quote. If you're going to choose things to quote, it's best to stick to poets, classic novelists, and prominent figures of the past -- not Dennis Rodman, Michael Scott, or Carrot Top.

Use "smart" words. Just sprinkling in a handful of "smart" words can do wonders for the impression you give others. Words like "hence," "sought," "shall," "divert," and "inquire" are good alternatives to other, more common words, but look them up to be sure when to use them. If you use them wrong, you'll come across as foolish. In general, English has a lot of French and German words. Sometimes the French word is “smarter sounding" than the German. Instead of saying "to answer your question" say "in response to your question." Instead of "begin," choose "commence." "Understand" is "comprehend," et cetera ad infinitum.

Express yourself non-verbally. Don't know what to say? Don't say anything at all! Let your face do the talking. Someone starts going off on a soap box you don't understand? Roll your eyes, wave your hand away, and occupy yourself some other way. Some people will question your behavior...and if they do, just run. You could always put on your "thinking" face. A slightly furrowed brow, squinted eyes looking up, maybe a hand near your face. Then ask them to explain further. You want the full argument before you respond.

Don't be a know-it-all. If you're jumping in every sentence and a half to prove just how smart you are, that's not smart. There's a reason Hermione Granger didn't have very many friends throughout Hogwarts. Most people know a bit about a few things and no one knows everything about everything. Be comfortable with your lack of knowledge! Just because you can't recite information about the structure of atoms doesn't mean you're not smart; it just means that's specific knowledge you don't have right now. It's something you can learn later. Ask some questions, but not too many. Smart people know a lot, but they don't know everything. They became smart by learning, so it's a good idea to occasionally say something like "I'm not familiar with that, can you explain" or "I hadn't heard that, can you tell me more"?

Thinking Smart

Be confident. Politicians aren't geniuses, they’re well practiced, intelligent, confident, and charismatic individuals. They speak with conviction and passion and people don't question it. Confidence gets people go to give more weight to what you say. This does not work if what you're saying is obviously wrong, it will make you look like you're trying too hard. Think about it. Two people have the same argument -- one person delivers it slow and with hesitation, fumbling with their words, and not making eye contact with you. The other argues with hand gestures, quickly and with clarity, and shows their undoubted belief in the concept through their passion. Who would you believe? Be aware of that nasty voice in your head -- the one that's trying to make you miserable and derail you from feeling smart. We all have one that's telling us we're wrong, beating down our confidence. That's normal. Just know that this voice shouldn't be paid any mind. It's just there to annoy you.

Know there are different kinds of intelligence. Just because you haven't read "War & Peace" doesn't mean you're not smart. You could be great at maps, spatial reasoning, or communicating with people. Most people have one type of intelligence they're pretty decent at. What's yours? You could be smart about nature, music, or even smart about how things move (not everyone can juggle). Maybe you're good with numbers, fixing cars, cooking, or gardening. If you haven't thought about it before, maybe you really are smart.

Know that most people fake it. Recent studies have shown that approximately 70% of people who act smart fake it around others. Know what that means? Those people you're worried about impressing aren't really all that smart -- they're just trying to impress you. Funny how the world works, huh? You know what that means? You can totally poke holes in their argument if you know where to look. Get confident -- your argument is just as valid as theirs. They just might be more convincing with it.

Question the status quo. Smart people are great at questioning things. Join 'em! Whenever someone presents something to you, question it. Why is it right? Is it rational? Why might people believe it if it weren't true? Is it good or bad? Just or unjust? Not only will you be smart, but you'll have your own opinions, too. We all get handed our cultures from birth. We get handed a political party, a religion, a belief system, manners, you name it, the adults in our lives shaped us from day one. Be open to the possibility that they were wrong. Consider different points of view. This will make you more confident in your belief system and better able to say why.

Be open-minded. Ignorance is a terrible, terrible thing. If you're close-minded, you're not seeing both sides of the argument and you're unable to put yourself in the other person's shoes. What's smart about that? You got it -- nothing. It's those people who were open-minded, that questioned the status quo, that have driven every culture forward. If people weren't, we'd still be in a very primitive society, content with where we are. Obviously nothing good about that. And it doesn't take much intelligence to simply be open minded.

Be curious. You don't have to know anything about a topic to have an interesting, intelligent conversation. All you have to do is ask the right questions. In much the same way you would ask a person questions until you find something, they really enjoy getting to know them, you ask a person questions to seem intelligent, too. Someone briefly mentions their trip to Antarctica testing theories on anthropogenic climate change? No one would be able to talk about that topic. Time to start asking a lot of questions to show your curiosity and desire to learn. Even if you don't have another person to bounce questions off of, you can get curious by yourself! Are you reading something online and run across a word you don't know? Look it up. A political concept that just is totally over your head? Look it up. If you don't know something, do something about it.

Notice things. You may not be asking someone about their penchant for fatalism, but you can notice tiny things about them that can give them other impressions. Insert little comments about something they mentioned offhand a bit ago or something you noticed in their home. The things we say and do are often indicative of our opinions -- you can put two and two together without them even knowing it.

Form opinions on controversial topics. When your gang starts a heated debate on the current economic crisis, the only thing you have to do to chime in is have an opinion. There's no right or wrong on all these hot-button topics (religion, politics, current events, etc.) -- all you have to do is a bit of research and soul searching. What or who do you align yourself with? When it comes to "controversial celebrity" topics like Kim Kardashian, a smart person is really not interested enough to have an opinion -- things of that caliber aren't really interesting (or at least you don't admit it). The talk around the watercooler is about the Bachelorette? Nope, sorry, you were watching a documentary on the Ebola crises last night or reading, you've never seen the show, sounds silly.

Doing the Work

Look smart. Though this obviously has nothing to do with actually acting or being smart, luckily for most of us, people are easily fooled. Slap on a pair of glasses, keep the make-up to a minimum, throw on a cardigan, don't fancy up your hair, and walk out the door (pants, too). Bam. It's totally stereotypical, sure, but it may also help you get in the zone! When we feel pretty, we get more confident -- by the same token, if you feel smart, you may act smarter. If nothing else, it's worth a shot. Don't make it obvious that you are trying hard to look smart. This will be looked upon negatively.

Keep up on current events. This one's easy. Plop yourself down in front of the TV, grab some popcorn, and turn on the news. Awkward silence at work tomorrow? What does everyone think about Snowden's manifesto? Bonus points if you ask the question and no one bothers to fire it back to you! Hit up CNN, BBC, or even your local newspaper. Heck, the AOL homepage. Too much work? Okay, a particularly in-tune Facebook friend's feed. The news is everywhere -- read it, form an opinion, and talk about it! It's not about being smart -- it's about appearing well-informed.

Beef up your vocabulary. Take some time to learn new words. The more words you have in your arsenal, the better you'll be able to express yourself. And the more words you know, the better the chance other people won't know them. Think of words you use a lot and look them up in a thesaurus to find smarter sounding words that mean the same thing. Or just go for a word a day -- you're vocabulary will improve in no time. English is so, so, so, so many words thanks to its history. A quick query into Google about "smart English words" warrants pages of results. Just make sure you use them! If you don't, they'll be hard to remember.

Learn some French or Latin phrases. Sprinkling in French and Latin phrases (really any foreign language, but those two are magnificent) can make you sound so sophisticated. There's a certain je ne sais quoi" about it all, right? You could say that ad nauseum, but what would it all mean? Doesn't matter, anyway. Carpe diem, regardless. Here's a few to get you started:Act Smart Step 21 Version 2.jpg Je ne sais quoi - literally, "I don't know what"; means an unexplainable thing Ad nauseum - to the point of nausea Carpe diem - seize the day In vino veritas - In wine there is truth Ad hoc - something formed quickly and haphazardly to address a specific problem Au contraire - on the contrary

Learn something obscure. While it may not come up in everyday conversation, learning everything you can learn about one thing does have its place. Once it does come up, everyone will remember that one time you schooled the entire room on the Korean War. So find something that interests you and dive in! No one can call you dumb -- you just know your specific stuff. Pick something from what you already know a little about. Maybe there was something in history class or English class that sparked your interest? A series of novels, a phase in history, a type of plant? It could be anything!

Use the Internet. Seriously, you already are so why not use it to help yourself? Spend an hour on wikiHow researching topics you know zilch about. Go on Wikipedia and begin with one topic and see how far away you can get in six links. Spend your time surfing learning things. Dictionary.com has a "word of the day" you can sign up for. Stuffyoushouldknow.com is pretty self-explanatory. Get into Memrise, Khan Academy, Coursera, and even CNN, BBC, and any other website that sparks your fancy. If you're unfamiliar, Memrise.com is games, Khan Academy is sweet videos, and Coursera are courses online you can take for free! You're probably familiar with CNN and BBC. But heck, even Reddit's r/explainlikeimfive is a good place to start!

Get a favorite writer/artist/book. If you don't know much about culture and the arts, all you need to do is find one. Look over famous paintings on the Internet and find one that really speaks to you (did you know some museums even have virtual tours online?). Read one classic novel. Get a favorite and learn about it. As long as you know what you like, you're covered. Don't know where to start? Look at the paintings of Monet, Gauguin, Dali, Pollock, van Gogh, Rembrandt, Renoir, or Michelangelo. Read Twain, Steinbeck, Shakespeare, Hemingway, Poe, Orwell, or Faulkner. Read the Spark Notes and see what sounds interesting!

Remember. Knowledge is just high-resolution regurgitation. People who are spouting off things to you are just talking about things they've read or what other people have told them, that's it. So start remembering! Place value on what other people are teaching you. When you value something, you give it a sturdier place in your memory. So when you spend that time on wikiHow, Wikipedia, or Khan Academy, write stuff down! Try to talk about it with someone that night. Get it cemented in your brain so you can actually use it, instead of it going in one ear and out the other. It's how we learn as children and it's how we learn as adults. Very few things are rocket science. But maybe you're interested in space you probably know a fact or two.