Slight them for the up-kept toilet seats. Blame them for forgetting anniversaries. Point out how they always depend on you for everything. But we women have to accept we love our better halves. Not despite their vices, but for some adoring guy qualities that will make us go weak in the knees even in our 50s.
Much like most of the womankind, I, too, tend to push, shove and blame my hubby for anything that's wrong with the universe (of course including me).
"You never really listen to me, do you?" is perhaps the most frequent line I use with him. I call all his jokes either poor or corny and refuse to laugh. I believe I'm given the sole responsibility to 'improve' his dressing, his style, even his personality.
But I have just realised that there's a lot to learn from my guy.
It happened when my younger sister called me up crying. "I'm giving up my studies! I just am!!" she kept on repeating. Just like a normal elder sibling tired of the theatrics, I yelled at her, telling her to grow up and be responsible. 10 minutes later, Mom called to tell me that my sis left home in fit of rage!
It was past midnight and we were going crazy with worry and fear, when she knocked on our door. It was my hubby who took her in, promised not to ask any questions and tucked her to sleep. The next day, he said, "You can do what you want. If you stay here with us for rest of your life, it's ok." Touched by his gesture, she got talking and before I realised how it happened, the girl was packing her suitcase to return home and resume her studies with double vengeance!
The guy has some super powers, I had to admit! Since then, I've been taking many lessons from this amazing fellow.
Are you married to bad habits?Flirting: Have you crossed the line?What makes a successful marriage?
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LESSON 1
Stick to the present issue when we fight.
Raking up the past is a big waste of time and energy for both of us. (Besides, he has a poor long-term memory, so it's a waste anyway!)
LESSON 2
Pick your battles wisely.
Shouting at him after every wet-towel-on-the-bed incident or every forgot-to-pick-up-laundry incident will only make him tune me out completely (and turn me into a shrew).
LESSON 3
There is no shame in hogging a cheeseburger in front of him, but it's a sin to order a low-cal dish and then covet HIS cheeseburger.
He'll always love me no matter what shape/size I become. But I must always remember - When Joey from TV series Friends says "JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!!" he speaks for all the guys. And the guy couldn't be more right.
LESSON 4
You must know when your head should rule over your heart and vice versa.
It's ok to talk through the night with your sweetie on phone when you're away on his birthday, even if it means five-figure phone bills. But it's not ok to buy a toaster simply because it comes in colour pink (choooo cute!). It's definitely NOT ok to expect him to buy a car model because you feel a 'soul connection' with it.
LESSON 5
It's not necessary that you like everyone in your SO's life, but it's important to accept them as they are.
He will never ask you to like them or love them, but his parents and friends are a part of the package. Rejecting them means in a way you are rejecting him. If you can't resist bitching, find a woman friend with patient ear. Better still, find a way to work around them or simply win them over.
LESSON 6
Be kind to your hubby.
Every woman learns this sooner or later. Trying to change small but extremely annoying things in a man = finding a needle in a haystack. Have you observed this? You always point out his public burping, but he mostly never comments about your fussy food habits that he hates equally.
LESSON 7
Don't fake the big O. Period.
Are you married to bad habits?Flirting: Have you crossed the line?What makes a successful marriage?
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